The gods used to be like that in my world, a long time before I was born. Eventually most of them stopped interacting with humanity, and I was hoping to change that, at least for me.
[ Julia was so excited about becoming a goddess, and the things she could accomplish with that power. Not in the start, when she realized where it came from, but as she did more with the seed and made it her own, she became hopeful. She probably couldn't fix everything but she could do something.
It's been difficult coming here and feeling like all of that slipped through her fingertips. That's probably why she's been resistant to Solvunn, until now, but she's starting to get in tune with the land, with the people. It could be Endrborrin started reacting to her because of that shift in her behavior, not only because of the flowers she bloomed. Her point of view has changed. Erik did part of that, whether he knew it or not.
She plays with the flowers at her feet, sitting cross-legged.]
After Reynard .... [ She hesitates before finally naming it, looking down. Erik probably already guessed, she talked around it before. ] Raped me and killed my friends, he believed he broke me. All I could see and feel was ugliness and pain. If I had his power during this time, I think I would have burned down the world just to feel something else.
[ There is a darkness in her that can't be purified. She will always have that darkness in her, the path that took her from that moment to actions she regretted. Julia doesn't know for certain she would have done harm with these powers, but she feels it in her gut. She wasn't being sane at the time.
The butterflies flutter around her, their little wings against her cheeks, and she smiles. Small, but there. ]
All he could do is destroy, but this is what I want, to create. To make lives better, not worse. So. [ She looks up at him, hesitant. ] I don't think he broke me. I think I'm healing.
reference to rape
[ Julia was so excited about becoming a goddess, and the things she could accomplish with that power. Not in the start, when she realized where it came from, but as she did more with the seed and made it her own, she became hopeful. She probably couldn't fix everything but she could do something.
It's been difficult coming here and feeling like all of that slipped through her fingertips. That's probably why she's been resistant to Solvunn, until now, but she's starting to get in tune with the land, with the people. It could be Endrborrin started reacting to her because of that shift in her behavior, not only because of the flowers she bloomed. Her point of view has changed. Erik did part of that, whether he knew it or not.
She plays with the flowers at her feet, sitting cross-legged.]
After Reynard .... [ She hesitates before finally naming it, looking down. Erik probably already guessed, she talked around it before. ] Raped me and killed my friends, he believed he broke me. All I could see and feel was ugliness and pain. If I had his power during this time, I think I would have burned down the world just to feel something else.
[ There is a darkness in her that can't be purified. She will always have that darkness in her, the path that took her from that moment to actions she regretted. Julia doesn't know for certain she would have done harm with these powers, but she feels it in her gut. She wasn't being sane at the time.
The butterflies flutter around her, their little wings against her cheeks, and she smiles. Small, but there. ]
All he could do is destroy, but this is what I want, to create. To make lives better, not worse. So. [ She looks up at him, hesitant. ] I don't think he broke me. I think I'm healing.